Poetry

caught between
very old love
and what most recently left
guilty in the face of death

transparent certainty
that an adolescent romance
colored everything
until 27 years later

on a quest
for fundamental order
amidst residual grief
that over tired sentiment

the first glance
of self completion

the message came after
my child was safe in bed

last seen dashing down the street
without his backpack

no wallet, no jacket, no cell phone
only 13, with bad grades and angst

some childless neighbors referred to him
as “bubble boy” and said he seemed a loner

best known among the younger crowd
as the one with fireworks on 4th of July

into the night men searched with flashlights
under the electric towers, in the ravine

women phoned each other, sighed, spread
the word, listened toward the emptiness

police presence was on
the case, missing child alert

late in the rain his French teacher spied him
on an overpass, wet and tired from a night in a shack

in a thank you message from his dad, relief careened
off his voice into the chicken soup bubbling in my kitchen

usurped of sensate self
she slept away
from adulthood

unaware of time
she avoided the onus
of labor

childishly wild
she masked her surprise
at menses blood

raped by neglect
she hid under beds
swallowed their secrets

frightened by talons
she shied from confession
veered off the stage

sensitive to touch
she cramped
onto the speculum

clouded by loss
she buried her essence
in slanted cursive

emptied of faith
she accompanied sterility
rode shot-gun across borders

shattered by loss
she appeared explicit
cracked her chewed gum

implanted with hope
she rejoiced at potential
bought into permanence

confounded by pain
she thwarted commitment
clung to stagnation

awestruck by delicacy
she cradled the future
fed into the code

humored by denial
she wrangled expectations
loosened her tresses

stricken by departure
she tallied her prospects
strengthened her core

sullied by longing
she abandoned ambivalence
dove into the ocean

warmed by security
she opened her chambers
catalogued symbols

awakened on purpose
she let go of youth
leaned into language

one celled
when concept
occurrence
small arched door
was like idea
sudden

edge bent in
first accommodation
then grape like cluster
suctioned to thick wall
symbiotic necessity
urgency

a light went on
big bang

smooth oval aloft
laden with likely
question of order
seamless first born

between fingers
held up between
hope and vanish
or relinquish

which came
which departed mother
born of dearly
yolked to

split open by blow-hole
puddled on foreground
on empty shell of

a gesture rolled
into a schematic
weather

interminable
then melt down
inundated

albumen of earth
genuine
loss pools